HOW TO UPGRADE YOUR MONEY MINDSET

(I realise this picture has nothing to do with money but it’s playful, which is how I like money to feel!)

(I realise this picture has nothing to do with money but it’s playful, which is how I like money to feel!)

As I come to the end of closing my Intuitive Business programme, I’ve heard quite a few of the same comments coming from my community…

“I’m not sure I can invest in my business”

“I’m not sure I have enough money”

“I’m nervous about spending the money”

It got me thinking about how I’ve changed my money mindset over the past few years. So first, here’s my story…

My father left when I was 6 months old and left my mother in around £20,000 of debt. Don’t worry, this isn’t a sob story, it’s just integral to how I’d created my own money blocks. Mum worked 2 jobs to keep us afloat and I watched her hard graft until I was 7 years old when she re-married and we became a little more comfortable now that there were two parents sharing the load of the finances.

I had my first job at 14. I used to do the families ironing each week for £5. By age 15 I got my first jobs - not one but two. I worked Friday mornings before school as a waitress and on Saturday as an assistant at Toni & Guy hairdressers. At age 16 I moved to London and got a job at Office shoe shop whilst I studied. Within 3 years I had my first job in PR at Estee Lauder and Tom Ford. My starting salary was £19,000. I worked hard! 9pm finishes were the norm. 

Throughout my whole life I had been told stories about my father. That he always pretending to have lots of money, but never really had it. He was ‘the player’ - all talk and no delivering the goods. He was a liar. When I met him age 22, I didn’t really like him. It took me a year of therapy to say that but I didn’t really like him. He was flash and I hate flash.

So, what are we seeing here is my own personal blocks and how they manifested:

  1. You have to work really hard to make ends meet. 

  2. Money needs to be earnt.

  3. It isn’t easy to earn money.

  4. If I earn money I’ll be like my father.

  5. Earning money is flash. 

I did manage to earn good money in my job in PR but a) I worked bloody hard for it and b) like my father, I spent more than I earnt.

It took me a long time to grasp why I ended up with the money blocks I did. But when I gave it some time and really looked at it, things began to shift.

Maybe the next statement resonates with you.

Many of us think about money from a scarcity mindset…

There isn’t enough.

I don’t have enough.

I can’t afford it.

You may find yourself afraid to spend money or you spend most of your money the minute it hits your bank account.  Maybe you don’t have any control of your finances and feel like you’re never on top of them. Maybe you are too careful for fear that you’ll run out at the end of the month.

Wherever you are with a scarcity mindset, you'll find yourself always focusing on never having enough money.

So what needs to change?

We have to switch from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset. But what is that? 

An abundance mindset is the opposite of a scarcity mindset.  An abundance mindset brings positivity to the forefront. It encourages you to come from a place where there is always enough. It allows your mind to be open to all possibilities, and encourages you to be open to each one. Once you start opening up and embodying this mindset, you allow your financial life to flow more powerfully.  Focus is key. What you focus on grows. 

So how do you make that shift?

Here’s some of the key ways I shifted my money mindset…


1. GET ON TOP OF YOUR FINANCES

Think about how often you think and talk about money? Do you think positively or negatively. Do you shy away from looking at your bank balance or away from being on top of your finances? I used to shy away from anything ‘money’. I didn’t ever feel on top of my finances but once I did, I felt 3000% more positive about money. I started saving money into an account so I could see money coming in and staying there. I went through where I was spending a lot of money, subscriptions I could save money by cancelling and most importantly, I started checking in with my money daily. Want to go deeper…If you can, take out your cash for the week and try to not overspend. Parting with cash makes you much more aware of money and your spending. 

2. SAY GOODBYE TO EMOTIONAL SPENDING

What is happening in your life that you are feeling emotional about? How often do you use spending money as a way to make you feel better? This was me for years = spending money I didn’t have to make me feel better. A handbag here, a posh dinner there - credit cards would hit their limit very quickly! When life doesn’t go to plan and we feel powerless, we often use money to make us feel that power. Money represents power so this isn’t surprising. Instead, try to tap into what is behind those emotions, what does the spending represent? What could you do instead that will actually feel better about where your life is now? I encourage you to get support if you need it here. 

3. GET SPECIFIC ABOUT YOUR NEEDS

How often do you take the time to think about money? Do you get specific about what you need to earn each month? Do you think about what a comfortable amount would look like for you? Start backwards here…how much is your rent / mortgage, your childcare, bills, food? Do you want to factor in some money for self-care (holidays, massage, spa days)? When I started getting really specific about how I wanted to spend my money, I found money became consistent and it was easier for me to reach my money goals. I started putting 5% of what I earn aside so I could actually feel good about spending money on myself, not afraid of spending it. 

4. MONEY TALKS

Be careful with how you speak about money? Do you always say things like, "I'll never be able to afford that!" or “I can’t spend this money”. I noticed how often I was really negative about money and came from this place of scarcity. I noticed my money blocks! As I got to know my money blocks I realised how talking so negatively was having a terrible effect on my finances. What I was thinking and saying was effecting what was actually shaping in my life, i.e. lack! Instead of coming from lack, I simply reworked how I was talking about money. Here’s some examples…

Lack:  I can’t afford it

Abundance: I’m not spending my money on things like that right now

Lack: I shouldn’t spend money of this

Abundance: I can spend money on myself when I’ve been so good at putting it aside

To put it simply, coming from a place of not enough comes from a place of lack and only calls in more of the same.

5. TAKE ACTION

How can you make money? As soon as I started showing up for my money I realised actually how much more money I could make by doing really simple things. And in taking that action and feeling into there being ‘enough’, even more would come. We recently came back from holiday and spent about £1000 more than I had budgeted. So when I got home I went around the house and looked at things we could sell to make the money back. Within a week I had made the money back and paid it off the credit card.  If you want more money, play the game! List 10, 20, 20 things you could do to make more money. 

I really hope this helps as a starting point. I could go on and on!

X Pandora Paloma X

P.S. If you are interested in learning more, the next Rooted Living Live on Monday 13th May focuses on ‘Upgrading your Money Mindset’. Now, this isn’t about being flashy and making you rich but more how we take control of our finances and feel more positive in knowing our worth and in talking and managing money. We’ll be deep diving into the impact of our mindset and the effect it has on our finances and getting specific about how we change the old patterns and move into the new.

Book your spot here